Postmarked COLNE LANCS 7:15PM 31 MCH 1940
addressed Lieut. R. Helme, D.W.R., Church House, Norton, Malton. Yorks. Pencil “A Co”
Albert House, Colne.
31st March.
My darling Ronnie,
I am beginning to get the dithers about tomorrow, but I feel that writing to you will help me a lot – just as seeing you would make me ten times more settled about it. Well maybe not, because it would make me feel more definitely that I should be marrying you, and not bottling milk.
Heaven speed the day my darling. That is the only thing that I really do want and long for. That is the thing that simply must happen: you me and our dear little love nest. Be it a mansion or “one up and one down” it will be heaven with you.
… Pause for cup of tea downstairs, which has put me out of my stride. Anyway, for the minute I have peace. The club to myself, but I suppose the rest will be coming up soon.
I am just thinking of last Sunday at this time. I would love to turn the clock back, then there would still be Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday – heavenly days. I did enjoy it – all of it. And do you realise that we didn’t have words – apart from about two over you going out of the flicks during – I mean before “God Save the King”, and that wasn’t very vital. I wish it was just then. Disagreeing with you is so much nicer than being away from you.
On Saturdays, I still think of the old Saturdays which I always looked forward to so much – going to the flicks with you. It was just the best bit of the week. But I never appreciated peace nearly enough. When it comes again I certainly shall. I think I shall go crazy with joy.
Oh blast, my writing is making me very annoyed today. I am fed up of it being so terrible, and I wasn’t to alter my style completely, but don’t seem to be able to. It is dreadful for an educated person, and I don’t know how you ever manage to read it. To think that you keep these illiterate scrawls.
That reminds me, I must get a big tin box with a lock to keep your letters and mine. I haven’t anywere else to put them at the minute, and will get into a hopeless muddle soon. I think Dad got his from Whittaker’s. I don’t know how much they are.
I bought a leather belt from Wildman’s yesterday, to put round my pants. I also enquired about leggings as I think they would look nicer than those thick socks and shoes. Mum has looked out Dad’s and they may do over my jodhpur boots.
Last night Dicky, Ria, Mrs Robertson and Miss Robertson who is blind, came to supper. They stayed till about twelve and we were feeling very sleepy.
This morning Moué and I stayed in bed, and were thoroughly spoilt by Mum who brought our breakfast up. We were disgracefully lazy, and stayed in bed till one. The last time I will be able to do that for a long time I guess. And by the time I can I shall be so full of vim and vigour, so strong and freshairy that I shant want to!
I have borrowed two books by Leslie Weatherhead from Joan. One on Sex and the other Christianity and Psychology. I shall have to read the former in the peace and seclusion of my lonely room.
Moué and Marj quite enjoyed the dance on Friday, but they weren’t particularly enamoured by Hux’s dancing. Nellie Fisher, Victor Leslie and Neil Hartley made up the party. Mr Leslie was evidentally in good form – his humour being dry and droll as ever. There were about 180 there, but they were not a very inspiring company. Loud folks on the whole.
… Now I have just had to go for a date. It must be the excitement about tomorrow. What if I do something silly. What if I put the steralizer on too high and crack all the bottles. Oh dear, dear dear.
Anyway, I will get a letter from you in the morning, and that will cheer me on my way. Oh darling, I do love you, and if it weren’t for the thought of you and what we will be to each other in the future – the near future I hope – I should faint by the wayside. You are just everything to me, as I know I am to you; and it will always be that way. Husband, wife, mother, father, brother sister, child – everything to each other. Oh my dearest boy, my heart is nearly bursting with love for you.
I shall go on writing to you as often as I can because it helps to write to you. I feel nearer you and I want you to know just all about me. Of course, I want to know all about you. So let me know whenever you can anything you are going to do, where you are going etc.
Beloved, I have some more letters to write now, though I am not feeling particularly eloquent – except to you.
I shall write tomorrow night and tell you how I have done. I shall be thinking of you constantly as usual. Wherever you are or however you feel, you can always be sure that I am thinking of you.
All my love with kisses, cuddles and caresses, Kathleen