Postmarked COLNE LANCS 7.15PM 3 MAR 1940
addressed to Lieut. R. Helme, D.W.R., Church House, Norton, Malton. Yorks
Albert House, Colne, Lancs.
3rd March.
My darling Ronald,
When I heard that you were “browned off” and fed up last night, I made up my mind that today I would write you a really nice cheering letter. So I am going to try – though probably you have become your cheery self by this time.
Anyway, it is high time I told you once more how much you mean to me. Yet honey, it is so much easier to express my love for you in actions than in words. Still, I cannot see you, and that is that; and all this waiting is bound to make the grande finale a thousand times more wonderful when it comes – as it will most certainly.
I hate to hear you say it feels like going back to prison, and don’t I know the feeling. It’s foul to go back to discipline and bamboozling and bossing – specially when you’re grown up. Never mind my beloved, think of the day when I alone shall bamboozle and boss you, when your only prison will be my arms. And that will be a prison from which you will never escape, and a prison from which knowing you, you will never wish to escape.
I often dream of the past, but it is the dreams of the future that keep me from wearying too much when you are away. And every day that passes is a day nearer happiness, a day nearer you – and Donald, and Michael and Elizabeth. Your happiness matters more to me than anything else because in spirit, as someday in body, I am one with you.
Darling, I have discovered that twins do run in our connections after all, so there is just a chance that you may some day, be an even prouder father! Two sets in Mum’s generation. A brother and a sister of Granny Dunlop’s had twins, one boys and one girls. Unfortunately one of each died in infancy, but that is beside the point as midwifery was not what it should have been then.
And now prescious, if I haven’t quite cheered you with “someday dreams” let me complete the cure with “soon dreams”. I have a definite feeling that you will soon be cuddling me in my nice wooly coat, and kissing me ever so warmly. I’m sure you’re going to see me soon. Don’t forget dear if there is any chance of you getting a few hours off in York, I shall come over just like the wind.
Now it is really time that I came down from the clouds and told you a bit of common-place news, my Angel Boy, or you will be saying at some later date, “you never tell me anything.” Well, I tell you the things I consider most important, even if it means repeating myself. e.g. I love you. Now you must have heard and read that a thousand times, and yet you haven’t grown tired of it, have you. I wont put a question mark, because it is a pseudo question, sort of.
… It is twelve thirty five and I have just had some Horlicks and some Aero chocolate. I am sitting in the bedroom where Moué is in bed with a sore throat, and cough. I am sitting at a card table in front of the window, and the sun is pouring in upon me. Can’t you see me beloved, aglow with love for you?
I had a very pleasant day in Blackburn on Friday. Mum went to her meeting and came home on the four something train, but I waited till the ten o’clock which was a through train, and arrived in Colne about ten to eleven. Minnie had to work in the afternoon so her Mother and I went to the flicks and saw Charles Boyer and Irene Dunne in “There’s Always Tomorrow” which was very sad. Booh hooh, but it was beautifully acted. In the evening we just sat at home and talked. Minnie is very nearly engaged and her boyfriend, sweetheart, whatever you want to call him, is going to Borneo for the Shell Max people in a few weeks, so I can see she will be sailing out to him in a year or so. He is to be there some years. Anyway, he’ll get out of military service – so she should be quite glad. It’s an excellent job, and the firm will pay a bride’s passage across.
I hear from Minnie that you were much liked by Joyce Holker who doesn’t like Minnie’s fellow a bit!
Darling, you’re adorable and I want to hug you and love you and kiss you and caress you, and pet you. Ooh, Angel Boy.
Yesterday afternoon I had a sudden desire to ride, so I phoned Judy, and hopped over on the twenty to three bus, and had an hour ride. Lovely after such a long time, though rather tame in comparison with Gisburn.
Prince has just come up here – the crazy loon – I mean lune. He has been annoying Jenny, so I’ve to keep him up here. I shall have to take him out this afternoon.
Last night Mum, Moué, Marj and I went to the Nelson Palace to see “Beau Geste” – Gary Cooper, Robert Preston, and Ray Milland. A very good picture – full of action and a sad ending. Of course you probably know the story – all about the French Foreign Legion. What a tough crowd!
I am glad you have found your watch, and yet I am sorry, because I would like you to have mine – and it rather too the Guilt off the Gingerbread when I had already had a new strap put on, and sent it to you. Still, I hope you will wear it anyway, because there will then be a little bit of me on your wrist. Purely Sentiment, but what better reason for keeping it?
Moué says I have been writing this letter all morning. Confound the girl, she wants to talk to me. She now says “I S”, which is a very good idea. In Spirit dearest, but I would rather it was in truth. But soon, I hope.
It was nice to hear your voice last night even though it was a sad voice. Tonight I shall hear it again my darling, and hope that this time there will be no one in the room. Remember I am thinking of you all the time and this morning at nine o’clock communion I prayed for you a lot.
All my love dearest on Earth, Yours, Kay.