Postmarked COLNE LANCS 8PM 1 Feb 1940 and MALTON YORKSHIRE 4PM 5 FEB 1940
addressed to Lieut. R. Helme, D.W.R., Church House, Norton, Malton. Yorks. Readdressed to Kings Head Hotel, Barnard Castle.
On reverse: I love you so much darling. Clough wants to know, have you any more EGGS. S.W.A.L.K.
Albert House, Colne.
1st February.
My darling Ronnie,
Once more Colne has become dead and empty, once more the cloud of depression has fallen upon me – and that big ugly lump has come into my throat.
It has been just heavenly having you home for a week, and I shall bless the snow for ever more. At least, I shall bless it if it has not prevented you from reaching Malton safely meanwhile. Oh dear, oh dear, I wish you were still at home. But if I just go on wishing for you to be here – you will be in another few weeks.
I have spent most of today sorting out Mum’s journalism course. Throwing a lot away, and cutting out the bits I think will be useful to me. It has been a big job, and I have now to stick the bits in a scrap book.
I went to Wonels (*) this afternoon and bought thirteen ounces of wool to make your pullover. I’ve got a nice pattern. Its in the same ply of wool as your other one – only a better quality. Just to let you know what a good quality, it cost me 8/6. Needless to say, I put it on the bill – meantime! I am looking forward to doing it as it comforts me to be making something for you.
I’m afraid I am writing a very bad letter. The wireless is on and Moué is making a din about her knitting. This makes it impossible for me to tell you just how much I love you. In any case words are so inadequate (which I can’t spell) I just want to hug you and kiss you, and nuzzle up against you. Oh for the day when I can nuzzle up to you any time. It’s vile having to wait for you like this when I’d marry you tomorrow. Hasten the day, hasten the day!
I am going to start writing as soon as I get everything straightened out. It is really surprising the amount I have written. Stories I’ve started and never finished. Some of the ideas are really quite good. Wouldn’t it be lovely if I could make some money. Then I’d save it up for us.
This letter isn’t half as nice as it should be – not quarter as nice as I wanted it to be; but somehow I can’t get what I feel out of my system tonight. This damned wireless doesn’t improve matters.
I wish it was last week at this time; but the quicker the days go the sooner the war will be over, and you and I will be able to settle down with your silver salver and cup, my tea set and a whole lot of love.
The Old Girl has been particularly annoying today – although I have hardly seen her, and haven’t addressed a single remark to her. In fact, I haven’t really said much to anyone. I’ve felt too lonely. It’s queer how one can be lonely in a crowd when the person one loves most isn’t there. And yet with you alone I am never never bored – whether you are loving me, talking to me, or just sitting quietly beside me. Dearest boy, you have just stolen the heart right out of me.
I am longing for your phone call. I hope you don’t phone before I – or rather while I’m at the post. I shall run all the way there and back.
Goodbye darling.
All my love,
Yours ever, Kay.